Work-Life Balance a Myth

What is work-life balance(WLB)? If you run this by google, You will get an answer as work-life balance is the state of equilibrium where a person equally prioritizes the demands of one's career and the demands of one's personal life.

It has come to my notice that I have discussed this term with an innumerable amount of people. I got the response that WFH (work from home) has supplemented a lot of additional work along with added responsibilities. Funny story, I have been one of the responders who stated the same thing to a lot of people. I always had this fixed answer ready to fire that - Yes, there is a shit tonne of work these days. It is so tiring.

Looking at this situation my programmer instincts kicked in. I thought why not try to locate the optimal resolution for this. I started digging and questioning. Why are we spending our energies enormously on achieving this balance? Why do we feel that there is no end to work? Why are we striving hard to work more than we are supposed to? What is the mindset behind investing these endless hours working? Do people enjoy constant overwork? (only a maniac would :P)

Probable reasons uncovered were:

• Our desires to succeed professionally taking precedence over our mental wellbeing.

• Difficulty in embracing the "new normal" of working from home and setting boundaries.

• The mistaken opinion that constantly working and staying busy is the answer to the "being productive" definition.

• Your employer had a gun pointed at you and shot(you) will be fired if you do not deliver (I hope this was not the case).

• Feel free to add as many reasons as you wish here.

We have established so far that work-life balance states, devote equal parts of time in work life and personal life. In an ideal scenario, that would be having a productive day at work, logging off in time, and then spending time on that hobby/project or with family. But I think this right here is the biggest misconception of all. Life is and should be more fluid than that.

We need to accept that there is no "perfect" work-life balance or separation that exists. To hell with perfection, I think there is no balance viable and that is the hard truth. The work and the living you do should be one unified entity.

No matter how hard you try there will be times when your work will bleed into your personal life and vice-versa. Entrepreneurs don't always have the luxury to take time offs. Does that imply they do not have a work-life balance? No, it only implies they are passionate about their work and they take pleasure in putting extra hours in when the situation necessitates.

I believe as long as it does not have an impact on our health (mental and physical) it should be okay to work for long hours on some days.

It is not about devoting equal times rather it is about a satisfactory level of involvement between the multiple roles in a person’s life.

There are times when one role of our life will demand more attention than the other. In that case, we should be able to devote our time and energy accordingly.

WLB should rather be about the "freedom to choose" how you want to spend your time. A harmonious integration instead of creating separate compartments for work and life. Life as a whole is a superset of everything. Your best individual work-life balance will vary over time, often daily. The right balance for you today will probably be different for you tomorrow. We should be able to define our equilibrium.

If you think you are constantly juggling things and feeling overwhelmed by work. I have a couple of suggestions that might help in attaining your balance.

1. Avoid Guilt Trips: Do not feel guilty if you are working too much or too little. I used to question myself when I logged off early (Having been there, done that moment?). It is okay to make time for yourself and choosing what deserves your time and attention at that moment.

2. Use flexi-time to your advantage: If you are fortunate enough to have flexible work hours. You can define your own work time. If early login and early log off work for you then try that. If you are a nocturnal creature like me then make it a point to log in a little late. Redesign your own 9 - 5 (11:30 am - 7 pm are mine) work hours.

3. Squeeze in periodic breaks in your day: I found this extremely difficult to do (my friends will vouch on this). When I get in the workflow I find it hard to take a break and disconnect. Recently, I have started to schedule break time to my calendar (work and personal) as an event. That notification just sparks pure joy in me.

4. Plan ahead: Set goals and priorities for the important task of the day. Get them out of the way at the earliest and block your calendar for the Focus time. You can try The Pomodoro Technique technique developed by Francesco Cirillo. The technique uses a timer to break down work into intervals, traditionally 25 minutes in length, separated by short breaks. Personally, 25 minutes is too short for me. I try 50 mins of focused work with a break of 10 mins as a reward.

5. Schedule a sacred date with yourself: This perfectly fits in with the current 'should not step out' situation. Take out time to do your favorite activities. Remember you are on a date with you, go on and impress yourself. What activity brings you joy? If you do not have an answer, that is okay too. It is a complicated question after all :p. Ask Google and try different hobbies (Nothing excites you then you can just go help your mom in the kitchen and she would be delighted not for the help but the intent). Wealth, joy even the biggest achievement sometimes feel nothing when you ignore how you feel on the inside. Your inner self will be in distress if you’ll not nourish your soul. Calm your mind by listening to nature sounds (good playlists on Spotify) or by practicing meditation (Headspace highly recommended) Find pleasantness within and everything around you will fix itself.

There are a lot more obvious tips on the internet to find work-life balance but I will not be listing them here. I just wanted to share what I have experienced and what worked for me. I hope this helps and you can seamlessly merge your work as a part of your life :)

I would like to close by saying,

We need to do a better job of putting ourselves higher on our own ‘to-do' lists. - First Lady Michelle Obama

See you next Monday. Until then Mask up, Stay Safe, and Stay Healthy.

P.S: Today, I did not upload this blog post in the morning like I do usually because I had work commitments that deserved attention (defining work-life priorities aren't that hard :P)